Sow to reap

Everything a man plants today; is a representation of tomorrow's harvest - unlisted

This applies to everything we do. Whatever choices we make today, we have to live with the consequences tomorrow. It's as simple as that! No surprises! 

Jobs, homes, school options, relationships, friendships....these are some things that should take a lot of thought, prayer and confidence BEFORE we make the move. They are pretty much life changing experiences that can either be good for you in the long run or totally bad for you and your future. 

Be wise about today, so tomorrow makes sense and still falls within the "plan".  

Changes

They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself - Andy Warhol

Time by itself doesn't make anything better. You have to put some work in.
It's a scary thing at times to think differently, or to even think on you but it very well could be the best decision you have ever made.

Remember, no one else but you is responsible for you. And only you know the way things are now, and the changes you would like to make or see happen.

It may and will be hard, but with much prayer, wisdom from counsel and knowledge from God; where you are today doesn't have to be the final script.

Amen?

Blessing #2

There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life - whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts - Elizabeth Gilbert

At this point of your life, hopefully, you are no longer blaming some person(s) from a past hurt for the way you turned out. At some point, you....(not your uncle or your first grade teacher) ....is fully responsible for all the actions that you manifest.

Your thoughts, words, reactions, friends, goals, decisions are all some of the little big things that make you a grown-up.

Think hard on your life's journey, make a plan that works well in your favor and choose the path wisely!
It's all up to you!

Hello, Self!

Ever being introduced to yourself?  What I mean is, have you ever had to have a real one-on-one conversation with yourself? Day in, day out, we put in a lot of hours doing what we think is right, but really, it is what others want for us.  Unfortunately, this isn't something that is usually discovered at an early age; we can go on for years and years, struggling and doing everything possible living out someone else's dreams and expectations. 

At what age do we realize that not only are we  dissatisfied with the way our lives are going, but we are also frustrated that we haven't done anything that we actually love and enjoy.

I shared in one of our group meetings that for about 17 years, I was led to believe that I was going to be some type of an Engineer.  The only part of the puzzle that was up to me, was to choose what field of engineering I was going to focus on. I decided to go with Chemical Engineering.  I really didn't know what that meant, all I know was that it sounded serious and prestigious.  In addition, my brother was majoring in Computer Engineering so it was perfect! 

Growing up, my brother and I were 1st and 2nd in everything, literally (simultaneously). When we had school-wide results, my brother scored 1st, and I scored 2nd.  This was our reputation all the way from primary school (1st grade) until secondary school (high school).  So, the level of achievement that I had gained really motivated me to stay focused in my engineering dream.  AND..my dad was really proud of us, so that was even better. 

Well, when I was 18yrs old, good ol'fashioned reality started sinking in when I started junior college (Laney College, Oakland).  I took Pre-Calculus and that wasn't bad at all...it was actually ok.  My brother and I were in the same class, we had the same study group, same tutor etc. With all my energy and efforts into the class, I got a B as my final grade...pretty good for me.  The next semester, I took Calculus 1.  It started getting testy. I couldn't stay focused, I hardly knew what the instructor was talking about, the math language was not making sense etc.  I couldn't get by an assignment without at least 4 hours a night of studying.  As a final grade, I barely made it...but ended up wtih a C (which was a breakthrough in itself).  But when I enrolled for Calculus II, I knew that if I couldn't handle the class, then possibly, this was not my field.  Things were really hard at this point, and to make things worse, if I was going to be a Chemical Engineer, I needed to also take Calculus III!!!!!!!!!

HUGE DECISION POINT...

So, I had an intervention with myself. I remember praying to God to help me get through those ridiculously hard classes.  And as I was praying, I saw myself come out of myself...and turn around and face me.  This was the first day I was introduced to myself.  It was pretty sureal!  I saw then that the only reason I was so stressed out with ife and having a hard time with my classes was because I never had ANY DESIRES whatsoever to be an Engineer. I loved people, loved talkng to people, loved walking people through life challenges and changes, loved studying behavior etc...and none of that was the job description of an Engineer.  I then realized that all my 18, 19 yrs, I was acting out on the expectations of someone else. None of those Engineering desires were mine!  No wonder I was getting really hard on myself when I didn't get something right!  

That was the day that I vowed never to be anyoone else, because no one else would be me! I knew what I wanted to do with my life and I was determined to focus on that and that alone.  The burden of expectations were lifted off and buried far away from me. I waved goodbye to my old self and said hello to my new-found self.  The person who God had put many other great things in.  It was great to be me, and not a version of someone else's me.

Ladies, examine your hearts and see if you are truly walking out your own desires or someone else's.  As women, we have 1000 + 1 things that the world, our spouses, our families, our friends already have planned-out for us...so it's really important that somewhere within us, we are fulfilling our own plans. And if you are unable to see or carry out your own vision for your life, then, let's talk deeper.  If you are up to it, please contact me (@ arighteouswoman@ymail.com) and we can discuss some key things, and pray together.  Time is too short to find out 10yrs from now that you have done absolutely nothing with your life but done a whole lot for someone else's life.

Self Builders:

• Do you know what things make you happy? Are you doing those things?
• If not, what adjustments or changes do you need to make to accomplish the vision and destiny for your life?

Relationships

A story of a relationship between a man and a little bit over 4,000 people is told in Matthew 15:32. The story is so simplistic yet it depicts a lot about the kinds of relationships you and I experience daily (or try to experience…or even avoid experiencing). Relationships are tough! They are by choice and every one of us chooses the relationships that we have. We decide which ones to invest in; which ones to hold on to; which ones to patch up; which ones to let go of; which ones to disregard; which ones we don’t even bother with, etc…the list goes on and on. The bottom line is that all the relationships we have are based on our personal choices. When you walk with someone for a little while, it’s only natural to see the different hats they wear; the different faces they carry; the different moods they have. The more time we spend with someone, the more we are introduced or invited into their world – and vice versa. And this is usually where the choice is challenged. Are you going to let them into your life? Are you going to let yourself into theirs? How much compassion are you willing to have with the people that are around you? Compassion is an inward affection, a form of mercy, a tender heart towards someone. The Encarta dictionary defines compassion as sympathy for the suffering of others, often including a desire to help. Webster’s dictionary defines it as a sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it. This exact trait is a strong key into another’s heart; thereby allowing you to offer sympathy and/or empathy. One of the important parts of a committed relationship is that you don’t hesitate to give something of yourself; AND sadly, a lot of us flop in this area. We should always take something good away from every relationship (no matter the outcome). Realizing that no perfect person exists is a great perception that will keep you committed in staying close to someone. You can freely persevere through a friendship or abide with a person; knowing that their/your destination is ahead. It also helps not to be bitter or unforgiving, if things don’t turn out quite as expected. Jesus said in Matt. 15:32 that He wouldn’t send the multitude away fasting (hungry, without food); lest they faint in the way. This is a very significant statement. It’s as if Jesus was so empathetic with the people for walking with Him for so long already (3 days) that He was worried about their well-being, more than why they were following Him in the first place. Unbeknownst to them, what He offered them was the reason why they were drawn to Him anyway. They needed sustenance, strength, hope and faith; and they received that and MORE! Think about this - How many people are connected to you? Do you know why they are so attracted to you? Are you able to give them a bit of what God has put inside of you; so they can gain some hope and strength for their own personal journeys? Our relationships are not always about how it feels to us; but it’s also about how the other person can grow from your legacy, your way of living, your outlook on life. Ladies, if you see something in someone that you feel needs some attending to, please attend to it. Don’t be selfish. Don’t say “that’s someone else’s job” or “that’s someone else’s ministry”. You might actually be EXACTLY what they need to make it through their next crossroad in life. Selah… (Meditate on this)