Mistakes?

A mistake is a crash-course in learning - BIlly Anderson

Mistake are made as we live. We can't beat ourselves up over it...the key is learning from it.

What have we done that we wouldn't do again? What have we done that we would definitely try again? Question is: are we better or worse from each experience? Do we give out hearts time to heal? Do we now live off that guilt? Have we forgiven ourselves from the mistake? 

Because God has :) even before you made them. 

Living comes with choices...good and bad ones but growing comes with decisions....better than good ones that result from learning from our experiences.

Know that if we give our mistakes to God, we will gain strength for tomorrow's journey. 

Friends

Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief - Swedish Proverb

Really good friends are hard to find and when you do, it is weighed by deep trust.

Depending on how old you are, you could decide to not even bother with making new friends. Most likely at an older age, your friends are already carved out and anyone else after that that comes along are either acquaintances or professional friends. 

However, when you do find good lifelong friends, make sure they understand you, can laugh with you, can be happy for you when you are well to do, cry with you when you are sad, won't get weird when you find love, marry or start a family, can empathize with you when you need them to, appreciate your dreams when you share them, stand by you in challenging moments, and isn't jealous of you when you have a major victorious breakthrough.

This type of friendship is hard to find, and keep but very rewarding when you have it.

You or I

When your brook dries up and disappointment comes your way, you do not necessarily need to assume that you did something wrong -  Brian Robles

This is a tough pill to swallow .... Because I like to do things well, properly and in order. And when something doesn't go as such, I immediately think its something I didn't do right or messed up in.

I guess I need to learn that not all things are within my control, and some things are others' responsibility. I cannot shift the results of someone else's task into my emotions and actions. It's a learning moment to stay in my lane.. 

In the famous words of my little sister "it is what it is" and there's nothing in my capacity that can change others. I am only responsible for my work. 

Persistence

If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying, 'Here comes number seventy-one!  - Richard DeVos 

It takes knowing what the end is going to look like for one to be as determined as this, so much that everything that is done is with such intensity and focus.

If you want it, you'll go for it.... And if you don't, there is absolutely nothing that can  make you this driven.

Motivation, determination, persistence, drive, focus, intention, and prayer can take you far if you place them in the right action and decision.

Your love language

Practically Speaking Grab some sidewalk chalk and have some fun with it! For example: If you want to show love or appreciate someone who has taken the car to work, write a big "VIP Parking" in a car shaped rectangle on the driveway where they park. Then draw a path of affirming words they are to follow once they get out of the car. By the time they reach the house, they will feel loved. Over the cold winter months you may have had the delight of acquiring some useless things. Team up with a loved one to find those physical (or even digital) items no longer vital for your lives together. If they need a new home, then pack them up and take to the nearest thrift shop or family in need. If not, trash them. You'll be amazed at the freedom you'll both feel.  Who says you can't make up your own holiday? Who says only birthdays and anniversaries are worthy of gifts? Pick a day with your partner, clear the calendar, and celebrate. Make your own theme, suggest appropriate gifts and go all out marking the day you choose. Spend some time reading to your child. Your child will enjoy each story, and you will get to experience the joy and excitement in their eyes that brings the book to life. Most of all, they will enjoy the quality time with you. When separated by distance, having physical items that belong to one another may serve as a tangible substitute. Perhaps a shirt sprayed with the cologne or perfume of your significant other may remind you of each other and of enjoyable times together.

Times

The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend.’

— Henri Bergson

In all situations, our perspective (right now) is basically our only lens. How we see it is how we will take it. However, some of us have a way to see the full picture, which helps to see a bit into the future and hence able to plan a detour if needed.

The other few of us are quite afraid of what's to come, so much that we are blind to the real reality. So what's happening now, where we are now, what's before us now is really our reality.

It's ok to be in the moment but all moments pass by and all situations change - not always for the bad but times do change.

Happy Monday! 

Lessons learned

Learning a lesson can be tough to admit, but on the other hand, can teach you things you’d never expect. 

Lessons learned help explain just how you’re feeling by giving words to something that may be tough to express. 

Before you act, listen. Before you react, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try - Ernest Hemingway

Anger

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. - Ambrose Bierce

Anger is just anger. It isn't good or bad. It just is. How and what you do with it is what really counts. It's just like the power of the tongue; you can use it to build or to destroy. The choice is truly yours. 

Someone once said that "anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to the vessel on which it is poured". This is very true! The longer you hang on to anger, the deeper the wound gets, the stronger the feeling grows, and the bigger the gap gets between the problem and forgiveness/restoration.

Determine in your heart how long the depth of your emotions will take you. And then get over it! 

Friday

Youth is like a long weekend on Friday night. Middle age is like a long weekend on Monday afternoon.  - Richard Nelson Bolles

It's Friday!!! If you have had a week like mine, then you've been waiting for today since 10am Monday morning :).

As you finish up your work week, plan to finish big....with most if not all your tasks completed. Then be strategic and plan   to do something special for yourself this weekend. 

You've worked hard, now play and have fun!

TGIF

Plan

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories —John Wilmot

It doesn't matter how much we plan on life, there are some things we just can't plan on and have to "play it by ear". 

Everything doesn't come with a manual; but you have to be able to discern when that happens. If you do, give yourself a break...take it easy, pray for God's daily guidance to help you through it and then trust Him in the process.

Oh the past....

It's ok to look behind you, at your past. Just be careful not to stare at it long. Just a glance will do - unlisted

The past is the past and there isn't anything you can do about it today that will ever change it. The more you revisit those memories, the more unrealistic things will be for you. 

Mind you, the past isn't entirely full of bad days, there are some good there as well. But you certainly can't re-live the good memories either....because that moment no longer exists. 

Yesterday is always gone and behind you; therefore avoid puting all your "today" energy into keeping it alive.

Put all your efforts into what's before you now and let that guide your decisions and confidence. 

Help

When helping others, do not look for a reward; if you are looking for rewards, don't help others - Chinese Proverb

People need help because they need help; therefore you help for that reason alone. One shouldn't go into a situation like this with a strategy to get something back. We should however go with a sincere heart, a plan to do whatever we can to make someone else's situation better AND the heart to keep them in prayer when you leave them.

Rewards come from God, not man. There is nothing that we can do to receive the kind of blessing that we deserve. These are gifts that only come from God. 

What we can do is position our hearts for something great, allow the burden of helping the needy to flow in us and then sit back and watch how God honors and blesses! 

Character

People without firmness of character love to make up a fate for themselves; that relieves them of the necessity of having their own will and of taking responsibility for themselves - Ivan Turgenev

At some point as adults, we have to take responsibility for everything we put our hands to. It's not fair to blame someone else or life for what's happening. We have a part in every path taken and its not always someone else that made us do it. 

We are full-grown, and are the primary holder of our actions. Things start getting clearer the minute we believe this and be real with ourselves.

Live wisely.... 

Little things

When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them - Chinese Proverb 

Everything you touch, use, buy, build.....remember that someone spent a lot of time and work in making it what it is now. 

Always appreciate the little things because its those little things that make the bigger things work! 

Motivation

“Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes - Benjamin Franklin 

It's not enough to want something, or even want it really bad. It's everything when you get up and go for it. And when the road gets tough, you stick it through and see it to the end. 

Nothing gets done without some good hard work and focus. Never give up, always determine daily in your heart to make your dreams work. 

Perspective

The flower that follows the sun does so even in cloudy days - Robert Leighton l

It's all about perspective! 

Keep your faith, trust, hope, motivation, determination, intent, drive, passions, will, emotions, focus, goal, heart and attitude in the right place (in God) and all conditions on the outside won't be much of a bother!

Happy Thursday! 

Resentment

Resentment always hurts you more than it does the person you resent. While your offender has probably forgotten the offense and gone on with life, you continue to stew in your pain, perpetuating the past. Those who hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment. Your past is past. Nothing will change it. You are only hurting yourself with your bitterness. For your own sake, learn from it, and then let it go.

~ Rick Warren

The power of freedom for our future truly lies in our hands. It's what we do today with what happened yesterday that explains it all. Our outlook on life is really a testament on how we have overcome our past and how we see the present and the future. 

Those little and big moments we faced have shaped our thinking, enveloped our emotions, created our boundaries and managed our expectations.

It's imperative that we get over any issues, so the future is clean and clear for us. It's no use dragging yesterday into today; it'll always be the present if we don't let go of the past. Let the past stay where it is and lets live today fully, so we can see all of tomorrow's blessings.

Dare

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. Stay hungry. Stay foolish.
Steve Jobs

It's what you love to do that comes effortlessly. You think of it all the time and you are always looking for ways to perfect it. That's passion!

If you've found it, hang on to it. If you haven't narrowed it down to one or a few, keep trying. But whatever you do, don't give up! 

Procrastination

“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” - Napoleon Hill. Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task.

Someone wrote: 

Over the years, I’ve come to accept that I’m a natural procrastinator. No matter how much I want to avoid it, its just my nature. Whenever there’s something that needs to be done – whether its big or small, important or irrelevant – my instinct is to “start later” or “put it off until tomorrow. 

I’ve come to accept that – no matter how much I want to avoid it – there will always be times when I’ll find myself frantically slaving away on a task that should have been finished yesterday, last week, or even months ago.

My thoughts: 

Procrastination, unfortunately, gives others a glimpse of the kind of person you are. It speaks on your character and hence put limitations on how much or how less you can be trusted with a task or project.

If you are honestly struggling with this problem; it'll be helpful to narrow down why this is a challenge and seek ways to overcome them.

Don't let these little issues grow into bigger problems that ruin your good life ethics. 

Moving forward

Maybe there's more we all could have done, but we just have to let the guilt remind us to do better next time - Veronica Roth

It's like experience....you live hard (rebellion), you learn quick (unfortunately), you do better next time (hopefully).

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over the same way and expecting different results. The test is pointless if we don't start doing things differently. If we keep repeating the same bad habits, guess what...it'll feel as if we are going around in circles. It's the strange feeling of re-living the past every single time. And what's even stranger is that we actually know what's coming next - why?? Because we've been down this road before.

The way out of this emotional and mental stress and mess is to do things differently, change the strategy, and mentally and emotionally decide to come out with the victory. It's definitely a hard one because the past is so so easy to do - its familiar. 

We have to trust that God has our best interest at heart and will provide a brighter, stress-free, blessed, productive, fruitful and peaceful future for us.

Just trust him and see what happens :)

Lessons learned

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards - Vernon Sanders Law

It is in every test that we gain experience and in every experience we obtain lessons learned.

Tests are there to grow us up. There is no sense in having tests if we aren't coming out of them better than we started.

Experience helps us learn so we are smarter the next time around... Right? 

Riches

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own - Benjamin Disraeli

Riches aren't always about money; they are things and people in your life that are a blessing to you (really only by the favor and grace of God)

You will find that there are people in your life that desire what you have. Some may have jealous traits or some may just be happy for you and where you are (genuinely).

As a friend, you'll need to able to pick this up and be sensitive to that. Be careful not to make then feel less blessed than you are or inadequate of having what you have. 

Instead, continue to encourage in them the great things that are happening, bring to the surface the little amazing things in their character that they don't quite see, and as often as you can - get the attention off you and on them. 

They'll appreciate you for it as it'll help them see that even though they are in a different season they too are blessed.

Be a good friend :)

Friends

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart - Elizabeth Foley 

Life happens and friendships change but the most important thing is that each friendship remains strong and still full of trust.

Be careful not to let careers, children, relationships, out of state moves, etc make a huge impact on your commitment to each other. Things will be different, yes, but let's hope that they are just adjustments and not life changing decisions.

Pay it forward

“Each day when I awake I know I have one more day to make a difference in someone's life - James Mann 

Absolutely!

On our drives, train rides, Bart rides, bus rides and on our walks to work....we encounter different kinds of people. 

It's a blessing to be a blessing to someone else. Everyone needs a bit of kindness everyday. Being nice can be giving a compliment, saying a hello to a passerby, paying for lunch this time, listening to a broken heart, pay for the car behind you at the toll gate, calling a friend on the phone, praying for someone, being available to help at a meeting and so on ......and then paying something forward.

It's a hard one but daily, we ought to be less selfish and less self-centered because you never know what someone needs and how timely your simple kind gesture can be.

Don't do it because you want a reward but because its the right human thing to do. 

Happy Monday all! 

Life happens

“Although we are in different boats (you in your boat and we in our canoe); we share the same river of life - Chief Oren Lyons

Life happens to everyone and it's important that we pay attention to all who ride alongside us. Everyone's got their own destinies and journeys (although some are extremely different and some are somewhat similar) - we can still learn from each other.

Life

Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be - Anna Mary Robertson Moses

As children, we had no control over what we went through; but as we grow older, it becomes our choice on how we will make our future play out.

Our journey in life is originally fashioned by our upbringing yes, however if our upbringing wasn't all great, we have to figure out a way to move it in a better direction.

With prayer, wisdom and counsel from God, we can gain understanding of what we are made of and where our journey will lead us. And then you hold the charge of making it happen.

Life, truly is what we make of it.