Gentle

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle - Plato

There is something about understanding that you are not alone (so, come out of your bubble), there are others that exist in this world (and they need mercy), and everything doesn't have to work your way (this is where you extend grace).

We have to be sensitive that everyone we talk to, run into, or meet has something that they are dealing with. Therefore, your approach is very important. 

Yes, be intentional about what you need, but be gentle in your approach. 

Love thy neighbor .....

I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious - Albert Einstein

I call it borderline nosy! ;)

Yes! We all have people in our lives that just can't do without being "in the know" or a part of what's happening or just plain old nosy about everything! 

What do you do with people who fit into the criteria? You love them anyhow.... Yes you do because this is just how they are wired and change isn't coming soon! 

As a matter of fact, it's a battle you cannot win because not only are they created this way; they also love love love the way they are and use it to their good advantage. Nevertheless, you love them

anyhow. Yes, love them anyhow ;)

You and them

I am because you are - African Proverb

It takes maturity to know how and when to appreciate your friends, colleagues and family.

You are who you are because of the road you have traveled, the people that walked alongside you and the experiences you took from it.

And yet another....

Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces us up, snow is exhilarating; there is really no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather. 

- John Ruskin

As normal as natural seasons change, so do our spiritual seasons. Each season comes with a test, the opportunity to take the test, the chance to learn and the open door to win. It is our job (in our 

mature state) to take these tests carefully and excel with victory.

Note, you are NOT alone and everyone goes through these. What you do in the midst of it is what counts. How you handle it is what really matters. 

The key is knowing that each challenge is another path to growth. It won't kill you, you won't die this time around, it's not over, and everyone isn't out enjoying life while you suffer. 

If you stop, relax and see what's really happening; you will realize that you have been here before (in another time, test and season) and since you got through the last one, you certainly will come out of this one better too! 

It's all about perspective! 

Our loved ones

Always kiss your children goodnight - even if they're already asleep.  ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

We should always say "I love you" to our loved ones even if we think they already know. 

Go ahead and give one more, yes one more hug and kiss.

Surprise someone with a sweet text at a random time today.

Make that phone call to that family member and make their day better.

When someone confides in you, be attentive and present; they need you at that moment. 

Remember, we all need each other...so don't hesitate to give a little extra. It can't hurt.

Friends

To have a good friend is one of the highest delights of life; to be a good friend is one of the noblest and most difficult undertakings - Anon Anyone can have a friend; but not all can be a good friend.  Friendship takes time and growth. It's about spending time, understanding what they mean without saying anything, knowing when to speak or love or listen or give a hug, having intuition on checking on them at the perfect time, praying for them etc.... Yes, friendship takes all that and more! And since its a two-way street, you need it too sometimes. Happy Monday!

You taking care of you

Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind. Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true. Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best. Forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future. Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others. Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you!

Christian D. Larson 

Well said!! 

Difference

In life you can never be too kind or too fair; everyone you meet is carrying a heavy load. When you go through your day expressing kindness and courtesy to all you meet, you leave behind a feeling of warmth and good cheer, and you help alleviate the burdens everyone is struggling with - Brian Tracy 

It is a good thing to exercise care, empathy, compassion, love, gentleness, grace and equality wherever we go. We just never know who is in desperate need of it to survive.

Don't be selfish with these.... It can make all the difference in the world to somebody. 

Yesterday

Your journey has molded you for the greater good, and it was exactly what it needed to be. Don't think that you've lost time. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the now. And now is right on time - Asha Tyson 

Absolutely!!!! It's time to start living fully...with no regrets or guilt, just living well.

What happened then, what happened yesterday really did happen, yes. However, it's over and done with and the greatest part is that what's left is you! 

With that in mind, you've got the rest of your life to make those experiences count. You learned from them, you are better today, and you are much stronger now. Walk in that truth! 

Thanks

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say 'thank you? - William Arthur Ward

Very simply stated....

Be thankful more often than normal ;)

Happiness

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has - Epictetus

It shouldn't take us losing something to appreciate what's already there. We tend to spend a lot of time in the "I wish I had" moment and totally forget the "I'm glad I have" reality.

Riches and wealth come from within - and that's pure happiness; not what youhave  or what we can see. 

Let's start practicing that so our children (now and in the future) will learn the difference.

Happy Tuesday! 

Today

The moment when you first wake up in the morning is the most wonderful of the twenty-four hours. No matter how weary or dreary you may feel, you possess the certainty that, during the day that lies before you, absolutely anything may happen. And the fact that it practically always doesn't, isn't the point. The possibility is always there - Monica Baldwin 

It's in our hands.....the power to control the path the day takes. No matter how much work we have going, or how many meetings to attend, or all the phone calls to make, or all the running around that the day brings....we are still in control of what happens with our emotions and actions. 

As we rise (in that beginning hours of the day), we have determine in our heart to stay full of joy, in perfect peace, on a positive path and at rest. 

As we practice this daily, we will find that what's on the outside doesn't shake us much; but the determination to win is the captain of our day. 

Happy Monday good people! 

Peace

When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this: you haven’t - Thomas Edison

While this is a perfect statement for some situations, it doesn't work for all. This can be a dead end for a lot of us. For some reason, we feel that if things aren't working out the way we want them to...we need to keep trying to force it to work. 

It takes wisdom and understanding to know when one more try is just what is needed and also to know when to walk away. 

Whatever the situation is, guide your decision by the peace you feel inside. If overall, you are at peace but a couple of areas need special attention; then another try is worth it. On the other hand, if it doesn't feel right, and you don't feel comfort; then it's time to move on.

Gossip

What you don't see with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth - Proverb

It's as simple as its said. Don't be a victim of gossip, he-said, she-said.....if you didn't see it happen, don't talk about it like you did. 

Gossip is a terrible act to be involved in because it really diminishes your character and places you in a not-trustworthy category. 

The best way to avoid it is to inform the teller of the "story" - that what you don't know is good and you will like to keep it that way. The more you say this, the less tempting it is for those "story tellers" to bother you with "what's happening now". 

You are responsible for what's been fed to you. If it isn't edifying, then please by all means - keep it moving and if they don't, then you walk away!! 

Commitment

There are only two options regarding commitment. You're either in or out. There's no such thing as a life in-between. - Pat Riley

It's like the bible says "a double minded person is unstable in all his ways". You cannot have one foot in and one foot out. Choose this day whom you will serve and them serve it to the fullest. 

You can apply this to every area in your life. You cannot be fully committed to two or more relationships, or two or more churches, or more than one employment decision.

It's not a fair choice to both worlds. At some point, one of the worlds will demand more of your attention and you'll be forced to think hard about landing in one of them - and being fully there 100%. 

Question is: are you ready to be faithful to one? 

Think on it....

Approach

When a person is down in the world, an ounce of help is better than a pound of preaching - Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton 

We all have our days. Some days are great and full of victory; some days are low and full of impossible chances. It takes the right people around you to know how to approach you in these very different seasons.

On some days, you may need a little bit of encouragement, or a little bit of need, or a truckload of blessings. And on some other days, you may need a good old fashioned intervention, or a bit of "I told you so", or some tough love. 

The key is knowing the difference and not beating someone up with the wrong approach if they are already down.

Tests

Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know  - Pema Chodron

Each test we face is another opportunity to grow and another chance for our faith to be strengthened. 

The longer it takes us to get it, the more permanent the test will seem. 

What is that particular test in your life that just keeps lingering AND what have you or are you learning from the process? 

Consistency

Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught - J. C. Watts 

I have heard a great leader say "whatever you do privately, you can do publicly", "if the lights were turned on on your private life, will you be happy with what the world saw?"

Bottom line is this - your character is a combination of what you do in front of others, your morals, your thoughts, beliefs, your private life, your work ethics, your life lessons learned and your faith.

These and other attributes make you the person you are today and because of this, it is necessary to put the time into building your actions to fully represent what your mind, will and emotions are silently expressing. 

It's time to bring both worlds together and make them match. There shouldn't be much of a difference when you are publicly or privately introduced.

True

If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time - Randy Pausch

Knowing the truth gives you freedom but speaking the truth supports your good character.

It's important to always tell the truth because this is the only way your words hold weight and substance. If you cannot be trusted, you'll always be avoided. 

Lets work on this ... 

Mistakes?

A mistake is a crash-course in learning - BIlly Anderson

Mistake are made as we live. We can't beat ourselves up over it...the key is learning from it.

What have we done that we wouldn't do again? What have we done that we would definitely try again? Question is: are we better or worse from each experience? Do we give out hearts time to heal? Do we now live off that guilt? Have we forgiven ourselves from the mistake? 

Because God has :) even before you made them. 

Living comes with choices...good and bad ones but growing comes with decisions....better than good ones that result from learning from our experiences.

Know that if we give our mistakes to God, we will gain strength for tomorrow's journey. 

Friends

Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief - Swedish Proverb

Really good friends are hard to find and when you do, it is weighed by deep trust.

Depending on how old you are, you could decide to not even bother with making new friends. Most likely at an older age, your friends are already carved out and anyone else after that that comes along are either acquaintances or professional friends. 

However, when you do find good lifelong friends, make sure they understand you, can laugh with you, can be happy for you when you are well to do, cry with you when you are sad, won't get weird when you find love, marry or start a family, can empathize with you when you need them to, appreciate your dreams when you share them, stand by you in challenging moments, and isn't jealous of you when you have a major victorious breakthrough.

This type of friendship is hard to find, and keep but very rewarding when you have it.

You or I

When your brook dries up and disappointment comes your way, you do not necessarily need to assume that you did something wrong -  Brian Robles

This is a tough pill to swallow .... Because I like to do things well, properly and in order. And when something doesn't go as such, I immediately think its something I didn't do right or messed up in.

I guess I need to learn that not all things are within my control, and some things are others' responsibility. I cannot shift the results of someone else's task into my emotions and actions. It's a learning moment to stay in my lane.. 

In the famous words of my little sister "it is what it is" and there's nothing in my capacity that can change others. I am only responsible for my work. 

Persistence

If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying, 'Here comes number seventy-one!  - Richard DeVos 

It takes knowing what the end is going to look like for one to be as determined as this, so much that everything that is done is with such intensity and focus.

If you want it, you'll go for it.... And if you don't, there is absolutely nothing that can  make you this driven.

Motivation, determination, persistence, drive, focus, intention, and prayer can take you far if you place them in the right action and decision.

Your love language

Practically Speaking Grab some sidewalk chalk and have some fun with it! For example: If you want to show love or appreciate someone who has taken the car to work, write a big "VIP Parking" in a car shaped rectangle on the driveway where they park. Then draw a path of affirming words they are to follow once they get out of the car. By the time they reach the house, they will feel loved. Over the cold winter months you may have had the delight of acquiring some useless things. Team up with a loved one to find those physical (or even digital) items no longer vital for your lives together. If they need a new home, then pack them up and take to the nearest thrift shop or family in need. If not, trash them. You'll be amazed at the freedom you'll both feel.  Who says you can't make up your own holiday? Who says only birthdays and anniversaries are worthy of gifts? Pick a day with your partner, clear the calendar, and celebrate. Make your own theme, suggest appropriate gifts and go all out marking the day you choose. Spend some time reading to your child. Your child will enjoy each story, and you will get to experience the joy and excitement in their eyes that brings the book to life. Most of all, they will enjoy the quality time with you. When separated by distance, having physical items that belong to one another may serve as a tangible substitute. Perhaps a shirt sprayed with the cologne or perfume of your significant other may remind you of each other and of enjoyable times together.

Times

The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend.’

— Henri Bergson

In all situations, our perspective (right now) is basically our only lens. How we see it is how we will take it. However, some of us have a way to see the full picture, which helps to see a bit into the future and hence able to plan a detour if needed.

The other few of us are quite afraid of what's to come, so much that we are blind to the real reality. So what's happening now, where we are now, what's before us now is really our reality.

It's ok to be in the moment but all moments pass by and all situations change - not always for the bad but times do change.

Happy Monday! 

Lessons learned

Learning a lesson can be tough to admit, but on the other hand, can teach you things you’d never expect. 

Lessons learned help explain just how you’re feeling by giving words to something that may be tough to express. 

Before you act, listen. Before you react, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try - Ernest Hemingway

Anger

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. - Ambrose Bierce

Anger is just anger. It isn't good or bad. It just is. How and what you do with it is what really counts. It's just like the power of the tongue; you can use it to build or to destroy. The choice is truly yours. 

Someone once said that "anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to the vessel on which it is poured". This is very true! The longer you hang on to anger, the deeper the wound gets, the stronger the feeling grows, and the bigger the gap gets between the problem and forgiveness/restoration.

Determine in your heart how long the depth of your emotions will take you. And then get over it! 

Friday

Youth is like a long weekend on Friday night. Middle age is like a long weekend on Monday afternoon.  - Richard Nelson Bolles

It's Friday!!! If you have had a week like mine, then you've been waiting for today since 10am Monday morning :).

As you finish up your work week, plan to finish big....with most if not all your tasks completed. Then be strategic and plan   to do something special for yourself this weekend. 

You've worked hard, now play and have fun!

TGIF

Plan

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories —John Wilmot

It doesn't matter how much we plan on life, there are some things we just can't plan on and have to "play it by ear". 

Everything doesn't come with a manual; but you have to be able to discern when that happens. If you do, give yourself a break...take it easy, pray for God's daily guidance to help you through it and then trust Him in the process.

Oh the past....

It's ok to look behind you, at your past. Just be careful not to stare at it long. Just a glance will do - unlisted

The past is the past and there isn't anything you can do about it today that will ever change it. The more you revisit those memories, the more unrealistic things will be for you. 

Mind you, the past isn't entirely full of bad days, there are some good there as well. But you certainly can't re-live the good memories either....because that moment no longer exists. 

Yesterday is always gone and behind you; therefore avoid puting all your "today" energy into keeping it alive.

Put all your efforts into what's before you now and let that guide your decisions and confidence. 

Help

When helping others, do not look for a reward; if you are looking for rewards, don't help others - Chinese Proverb

People need help because they need help; therefore you help for that reason alone. One shouldn't go into a situation like this with a strategy to get something back. We should however go with a sincere heart, a plan to do whatever we can to make someone else's situation better AND the heart to keep them in prayer when you leave them.

Rewards come from God, not man. There is nothing that we can do to receive the kind of blessing that we deserve. These are gifts that only come from God. 

What we can do is position our hearts for something great, allow the burden of helping the needy to flow in us and then sit back and watch how God honors and blesses! 

Character

People without firmness of character love to make up a fate for themselves; that relieves them of the necessity of having their own will and of taking responsibility for themselves - Ivan Turgenev

At some point as adults, we have to take responsibility for everything we put our hands to. It's not fair to blame someone else or life for what's happening. We have a part in every path taken and its not always someone else that made us do it. 

We are full-grown, and are the primary holder of our actions. Things start getting clearer the minute we believe this and be real with ourselves.

Live wisely.... 

Little things

When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them - Chinese Proverb 

Everything you touch, use, buy, build.....remember that someone spent a lot of time and work in making it what it is now. 

Always appreciate the little things because its those little things that make the bigger things work! 

Motivation

“Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes - Benjamin Franklin 

It's not enough to want something, or even want it really bad. It's everything when you get up and go for it. And when the road gets tough, you stick it through and see it to the end. 

Nothing gets done without some good hard work and focus. Never give up, always determine daily in your heart to make your dreams work. 

Perspective

The flower that follows the sun does so even in cloudy days - Robert Leighton l

It's all about perspective! 

Keep your faith, trust, hope, motivation, determination, intent, drive, passions, will, emotions, focus, goal, heart and attitude in the right place (in God) and all conditions on the outside won't be much of a bother!

Happy Thursday! 

Resentment

Resentment always hurts you more than it does the person you resent. While your offender has probably forgotten the offense and gone on with life, you continue to stew in your pain, perpetuating the past. Those who hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment. Your past is past. Nothing will change it. You are only hurting yourself with your bitterness. For your own sake, learn from it, and then let it go.

~ Rick Warren

The power of freedom for our future truly lies in our hands. It's what we do today with what happened yesterday that explains it all. Our outlook on life is really a testament on how we have overcome our past and how we see the present and the future. 

Those little and big moments we faced have shaped our thinking, enveloped our emotions, created our boundaries and managed our expectations.

It's imperative that we get over any issues, so the future is clean and clear for us. It's no use dragging yesterday into today; it'll always be the present if we don't let go of the past. Let the past stay where it is and lets live today fully, so we can see all of tomorrow's blessings.

Dare

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. Stay hungry. Stay foolish.
Steve Jobs

It's what you love to do that comes effortlessly. You think of it all the time and you are always looking for ways to perfect it. That's passion!

If you've found it, hang on to it. If you haven't narrowed it down to one or a few, keep trying. But whatever you do, don't give up! 

Procrastination

“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” - Napoleon Hill. Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task.

Someone wrote: 

Over the years, I’ve come to accept that I’m a natural procrastinator. No matter how much I want to avoid it, its just my nature. Whenever there’s something that needs to be done – whether its big or small, important or irrelevant – my instinct is to “start later” or “put it off until tomorrow. 

I’ve come to accept that – no matter how much I want to avoid it – there will always be times when I’ll find myself frantically slaving away on a task that should have been finished yesterday, last week, or even months ago.

My thoughts: 

Procrastination, unfortunately, gives others a glimpse of the kind of person you are. It speaks on your character and hence put limitations on how much or how less you can be trusted with a task or project.

If you are honestly struggling with this problem; it'll be helpful to narrow down why this is a challenge and seek ways to overcome them.

Don't let these little issues grow into bigger problems that ruin your good life ethics. 

Moving forward

Maybe there's more we all could have done, but we just have to let the guilt remind us to do better next time - Veronica Roth

It's like experience....you live hard (rebellion), you learn quick (unfortunately), you do better next time (hopefully).

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over the same way and expecting different results. The test is pointless if we don't start doing things differently. If we keep repeating the same bad habits, guess what...it'll feel as if we are going around in circles. It's the strange feeling of re-living the past every single time. And what's even stranger is that we actually know what's coming next - why?? Because we've been down this road before.

The way out of this emotional and mental stress and mess is to do things differently, change the strategy, and mentally and emotionally decide to come out with the victory. It's definitely a hard one because the past is so so easy to do - its familiar. 

We have to trust that God has our best interest at heart and will provide a brighter, stress-free, blessed, productive, fruitful and peaceful future for us.

Just trust him and see what happens :)

Lessons learned

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards - Vernon Sanders Law

It is in every test that we gain experience and in every experience we obtain lessons learned.

Tests are there to grow us up. There is no sense in having tests if we aren't coming out of them better than we started.

Experience helps us learn so we are smarter the next time around... Right? 

Riches

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own - Benjamin Disraeli

Riches aren't always about money; they are things and people in your life that are a blessing to you (really only by the favor and grace of God)

You will find that there are people in your life that desire what you have. Some may have jealous traits or some may just be happy for you and where you are (genuinely).

As a friend, you'll need to able to pick this up and be sensitive to that. Be careful not to make then feel less blessed than you are or inadequate of having what you have. 

Instead, continue to encourage in them the great things that are happening, bring to the surface the little amazing things in their character that they don't quite see, and as often as you can - get the attention off you and on them. 

They'll appreciate you for it as it'll help them see that even though they are in a different season they too are blessed.

Be a good friend :)

Friends

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart - Elizabeth Foley 

Life happens and friendships change but the most important thing is that each friendship remains strong and still full of trust.

Be careful not to let careers, children, relationships, out of state moves, etc make a huge impact on your commitment to each other. Things will be different, yes, but let's hope that they are just adjustments and not life changing decisions.

Pay it forward

“Each day when I awake I know I have one more day to make a difference in someone's life - James Mann 

Absolutely!

On our drives, train rides, Bart rides, bus rides and on our walks to work....we encounter different kinds of people. 

It's a blessing to be a blessing to someone else. Everyone needs a bit of kindness everyday. Being nice can be giving a compliment, saying a hello to a passerby, paying for lunch this time, listening to a broken heart, pay for the car behind you at the toll gate, calling a friend on the phone, praying for someone, being available to help at a meeting and so on ......and then paying something forward.

It's a hard one but daily, we ought to be less selfish and less self-centered because you never know what someone needs and how timely your simple kind gesture can be.

Don't do it because you want a reward but because its the right human thing to do. 

Happy Monday all! 

Life happens

“Although we are in different boats (you in your boat and we in our canoe); we share the same river of life - Chief Oren Lyons

Life happens to everyone and it's important that we pay attention to all who ride alongside us. Everyone's got their own destinies and journeys (although some are extremely different and some are somewhat similar) - we can still learn from each other.

Life

Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be - Anna Mary Robertson Moses

As children, we had no control over what we went through; but as we grow older, it becomes our choice on how we will make our future play out.

Our journey in life is originally fashioned by our upbringing yes, however if our upbringing wasn't all great, we have to figure out a way to move it in a better direction.

With prayer, wisdom and counsel from God, we can gain understanding of what we are made of and where our journey will lead us. And then you hold the charge of making it happen.

Life, truly is what we make of it.